Sunday, May 14, 2006

a different kind of m & m

aunt flo, yo.

it being mother's day, it seems appropriate that i woke up this morning to discover that Aunt Flo had arrived in all of her scarlet glory. seems to explain the recent crying jags as well. blame it on the moooooooon. my friend, r, tells me that last night was a full moon, so that means i'm on a "good cycle." whatever that means. a good cycle. hm. i still have cramps, i just downed a whole box of Whoppers in a dark movie theater, i feel and look pregnant, and want to cry constantly, but at least i am on a "good cycle."

rejoice, people! my uterus is in harmony with the universe!

so, then of course, today is mother's day.

(cue Beethoven's Fifth.)

so that coupled with the whole menstruation madness has me more than a wee put it mildly.

i've been trying to take really good care of myself today.

i woke up late and strolled to the bagel shop. stopped into the drugstore to purchase "feminine supplies" (to quote my stepmother) and in memoriam of my mom, Andes Mints (big treats for when guests came).

browsed the yellow roses selection at the deli, thinking i might buy some in homage to mom's favorite shade, but decided economical Jane wouldn't have paid $20 for a bouquet of brown-edged roses. so, in a more fitting homage to mom, i didn't buy them.

spent the morning watching Audrey Hepburn and Fred Astaire in Funny Face (mom fostered my love for musicals. i'd dance around in the living room for hours in just pink tights and a t-shirt listening to Oklahoma! and Sound of Music.)

went to brunch and a movie with the Urban Family in midtown. laughed so hard i snorted.

came home, wept a wee bit, and will soon go to my meditation class so i can learn to just be with my weepy, crampy, i'm 31, but still-want-my-mommy-ness.

wonder what it might be like to grow up?

heavens, i hope i never quite know.

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