a minor explosion + a movie

my cleanse died an unsightly death on friday night.

met my friend r for drinks and dinner. what i ate was not on the cleanse. i justified my meal - a veggie burger with french fries - by telling myself that it was all plant-based (excepting the giant puddle of blue cheese on top of the burger), and the 1.5 martinis i drank were clear...like water, i told myself.

ha.

ha.

ha.

my stomach could not be fooled.

excuse me, you feed me nothing but raw vegetables and fruit all day long, then you expect me to just up and deal with this? just so you know, i'm gonna keep you up all night, and that little road trip you're planning on taking tomorrow to South Orange, New Jersey is going to rawther terrifying for you b/c i just might explode at any moment with absolutely no warning other than a swift kick of nausea just before i blow.

that'll teach me.

----

on saturday night, i stayed in and watched movies. the 40-year old virgin - snorting laughter, people, snorting, raucous laughter - and a charming little fluff of a movie - last holiday with queen latifah. she plays a quiet frump who lives very...safely. she loves to cook extravagant feasts for others, but will only eat Lean Cuisine for dinner. she has an enormous crush on a boy, but can hardly speak to him. (god, this sounds so painfully familiar). anywhoo...she finds out she has just a few weeks to live and...oh, you know the story. it is what it is what it is, folks, but it is sweet, and it's absolutely refreshing to see a woman (and an African-American one no less) who is not a size 2 starring in a Hollywood movie as a smart, intelligent, desirable woman...not the maid or snarky sidekick. and, she gets the cute boy (LL Cool J) in the end!

gerard depardieu is in the movie as well. he's so charming and so very french. sigh. he has the best line in the movie. he says to queen latifah's character (and i paraphrase):

GD: you and me, we know the secret to life.

QL: oh yeah, and what is that?

GD: butter.